


Taming the Monster

by AnnSnape



Series: Larry stuff [4]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Angst, Author Harry, Comfort, Control, Dark Harry, Dark Harry Styles, Dom Louis, Dom/sub Play, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Famous Harry, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Light BDSM, M/M, Manager Niall, Mention of Dom Harry, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Smut, Sub Harry, Therapist Liam, Violent Harry, Writer Harry, but he tries to control it, but not much!, control play, kind of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2018-08-13 15:08:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7981006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnSnape/pseuds/AnnSnape
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry has fantasies. But non-sexual. Violent ones. He tries to control them but it is hard. Someday Louis comes along his way and loves to help him out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

26 years old. Over 100 books written, most of them best-seller and a big fandom behind them. That’s the things Harry Styles could be proud of. It’s the dream of many people. But this isn’t his dream. Harry isn’t fond of the idea to write but it is his only way to live his fantasies. Harry is the most famous Horror-Thriller author of the century but not of his writing skills but of his fantasies, he projects into his work. All his books are different fantasies of how to kill people and let them feel pain, let them slowly die until the point that they wish they were never born in the first place. Harry loves the face of people in pain. Most of his film collection is horror, splatter or hardcore BDSM films. He likes when the eyes are wide and tears stream over the face. When they beg for mercy but he continues and seeing the failing hope in the eyes of his victims.  
It isn’t a sexual pleasure for him, it is a need. It is his life to feel the pain from them.

Harry sees himself as a dangerous monster. But he isn’t stupid. He knows it is wrong. Very wrong. That’s the reason he stopped dating people at the age of 19 and started a therapy at the age of 20. He was unemployed until his therapist suggested to write down his fantasies. It worked. 6 years later he never killed anyone and has a primal control over his own monster side. But he is lonely.  
For the safety of the people, Harry only contacts his publishers via email. He only goes out to go to the grocery store, his nighttime walks through the park when really nobody is outside anymore or to his BDSM club. Well, it is not his club but Harry likes to call it his club. It is the only place where he can live out some of his needs in the role of a dominant. He still must control himself to not overstep the boundaries of his Subs, but it is something at least. Through the time, he learned to control himself more and more and hears they safe-words less than at the beginning.

At the moment, Harry sits in his therapist’s office and has his weekly talk. Harry really likes his therapist, mostly because of his name. “...and how are you feeling today Mr Styles?”  
“Restless Mr Payne. But else good. The usual I guess.” His therapist nodded. “Is the restless feeling the same than last weeks? Did it change?”  
“It became more intense I think...”  
“Did you visit the club lately?”  
“Yes, twice this week and it’s Wednesday...” Mr Payne frown. “I thought it helps you to find rest.”  
“At the beginning, it did but now I just feel worse. It’s good and bad at the same time. I need it but I don’t feel better after it.”  
Mr Payne goes silent and writes some very important things on his papers. While Harry stares at the ceiling Mr Payne asks, “You always play as a Dom, right?”  
“Yeah… why?”  
“Did you ever considered to play the Subpart in a play?”  
Well, that hit Harry off guard. He did never consider it. Why would he? He needs to play out his fantasies and not to be the guinea pig for another Dom to play with. “No.” He simply says.  
“Well, maybe you could try it? Just once. Talk to a professional dominant and see how he could help you.”  
After that Harry’s talk hour was nearly over and Harry couldn’t forget the idea. He could try it. Harry had nothing to lose, right?

He goes to the club on Thursday. “The normal?” The person behind the desk asks. “No.”, says Harry slowly, “I... want to try something new?”  
“What can we do for you?”  
“I would like to try out the other part of a play.”  
“So… you search for a Dom today?”  
Harry nod.  
“Well great… wait a second...uhm...yeah, Mr Tomlinson is free now. He is very good with newbies too.” The person smiles at him. “...great...”, Harry mumbles while he gets the room number from Mr Tomlinson.

Harry knocks at the door. The door opens and a smaller man looks at him. “Harry Styles?” He asks with a bright voice. “Yes.”  
“Great, come in.” Harry steps into the room. There is one bed on the right side of the room and on the wall straightforward are different objects for light play and a drawer. In the left of the room is a big sofa. Nothing spectacular like Harry always likes to use. “My name is Louis Tomlinson but while we play I like to be called Mr Tomlinson or just Sir. Ok?”  
“Yes.” Harry says. It is weird for him to be on the other from the play.  
“You are new to this right?” Louis asks.  
“Well, I was never a Sub but a Dom. I was told to try out the other side of it.”  
“Oh, ok. How long did you play as a Dom?”  
“About two years now.”  
Louis eyes wide, “Oh wow. That’s long. Why now? I mean why do you want to change the position?”  
“Being a Dom doesn’t relax me anymore. I… I start to feel more stressed by it.”  
“Ok… well then let’s talk about why you want to be a Sub so we can see what you may need? Come sit with me.”  
They sit on the sofa. “Harry, why did you become a Dom?”  
Because otherwise, I would kill people, he couldn’t say that. “I need to have control over a situation. Also, I love the reaction of the...Sub. But lately, the control thing makes me feel worse than better. Don’t know what happened.”  
“So, control play. As a Sub, you give up your control. Either way to please the Dom, get to say what to do and getting attention or you could just like to completely give up yourself. Let the thoughts and moves of your body flow and don’t worry about anything.”  
Louis looks at Harry to see how he reacts. But Harry’s poker face is strong until Louis mention the not-to-worry part. Harry always must worry about his own thoughts. Not to get too deep into his mind to avoid the brutality of it. 

Harry thinks about what Louis said. “So… I wouldn’t have any control over myself?”  
“You would give me the control over your body and mind, yes. How does that sound?” Harry becomes excited and nervous. He gets triggered by the fact not to worry about everything he does or think of. His breath goes heavier, “I think… I would like to try that...” Louis smiles, “Yeah? Would you like me to tie you up on the bed until you can’t move? Not able to control your body and let me do? To rule over you?”  
It is different for Harry. Not to control himself every second? It is unfamiliar yet so tempting. He nods and looks toward the bed. Louis stands up, “Than get undressed for me, love. I guess you can let on your underwear because this is our first play together. Lay on your back.” Harry’s heart beats faster, yes, he is nervous.  
“Yes, Mr Tomlinson.” He says and undress and lays on the bed. He hears Louis grabbing some objects. When he sits on the bed he talks again. “I will tie your hands on the headboard of the bed and see how it feels for you, ok? Your safe words are the standard from this club, right?”  
“I always use the standard and yes… I’m ready…” Louis smiles, “Good, I begin then.”  
Harry puts his arms above his head, Louis grabs them and fixes them on the bed and binds him to it. He can’t move his hands anymore without feeling the restriction. “Does it hurt?” It does but in a good way. The hurt tells him to behave and he loves it. “No, it’s good.” He says. Harry concentrates on his situation. He needs more. His hands are good, but not enough. “More, please.” He plea and looks at Mr Tomlinson. Harry doesn't know how he looks but Mr Tomlinson is surprised with him. He didn’t expect this submissive reaction from a former Dom. He nods, “Of course, love. Wait a second. Legs together or spread?”  
“Spread.” Louis gets the rope and fixes one leg from Harry on the bed. After Harry feels that he can’t move his leg anymore his body becomes light. He feels like he would fly on a comfortable cloud. “The other one too, please.” He says when Louis doesn't bind his other leg fast enough. “Eager, are we?” Louis teases him. Harry whines and his body becomes hotter. Louis finally binds the other leg too and now Harry can’t move anymore. He can’t go away or defend himself. He is in control but on the other side not. He gets controlled. Harry loves it.

Harry closes his eyes and breathe deeply. “Everything alright?” Mr Tomlinson asks. Harry nods. “Words love.” Without opening his eyes, he answers, “I can’t do anything...”  
“Well, that’s the plan, love.”, Louis says softly, “But do you like it?”  
Harry relax his body, not to worry about acting the wrong way. “I don’t have to think about it… what I do, what I’m allowed to do...” Harry breaks a big smile and a warm calm feeling waves in him. He begins to cry. “It feels so good.” He nearly moans.  
Louis observes him carefully. He feels proud of himself and Harry too. Harry looks so beautiful and calm. Before, he could tell that Harry was under a lot of strain. But now he looks free from it. “I’m happy to hear that.” Louis says. Harry opens his wet eyes and looks at Louis, “Thanks.”, he says. Louis giggles a little because Harry looks so much younger than he is. He grabs a tissue and dries Harry’s eyes carefully.

When Harry feels the warm hand on his face he graves for more. “Please touch me more, … sir.” Harry says so quietly Louis almost don’t hear it. He sits beside Harry’s waist and stroke his hand over Harry’s stomach and breast. He looks at Harry’s face not wanting to miss anything. Louis massages Harry’s shoulders wanders slowly down until his abdomen. He teases Harry a little with his hands. He doesn’t want to massage his groin yet but let Harry thinks he would. He teases him more when he slightly wanders his fingers on his skin right before the waistband from Harry’s underwear. Louis hears Harry whine and his hips move to finally meet Louis' fingers but Louis just pins his waist on the bed again. “Did I say that you can move?” He asks. “No sir...”  
“Right, I didn’t. So, behave sweetheart.” Harry nods and bites his lips a little. He already has a hard-on and graves for Mr Tomlinson’s attention. Louis teases him a little more but Harry can’t take it anymore, “Please Mr Tomlinson...please touch me...”  
“Touch you? But I do, dear Harry, I do.” He answers with a mischievous smile. Harry sees it and his body shivers. He weirdly loves it to be teased and smiles weakly. “Please Sir, please...” Harry asks louder and with more confidence. He feels safe under Louis' hands. “When you ask so nicely...” Louis says and moves now his fingers up and down of his cock. Harry moans, wants to move but can’t. The touch still is too light. It makes Harry mad and serene at the same time.

Harry moans more and his cock twitches under Louis undying touch. Mr Tomlinson starts to stroke Harry with his whole hand. “I’m close sir, please faster sir.” It seems like that Harry’s skin begins to burn, he feels so vulnerable too. Louis can’t look away from him. He is a captured in Harry’s figure and noises. “Come, love, come good for me.” Louis breaths out and feel more excited than usual. Meanwhile, Harry floats in his high and comes hard, after he gets the permission. Without any control over his own body, he moans loudly and let’s go. He lets go of his body and his mind, still floating. He didn’t even notice that he cries at the end. His body is at peace and feels warm. Harry never felt this warm and content in his body. He smiles. Just smiles and giggled. Louis watched him the whole time and is out of breath himself. And he is hard. Like super hard. Never had any submissive this power over him. He didn’t blink either, don’t want to miss any second of this beautiful man underneath him.

After a few seconds, he wants to free Harry but he protests. “No! Not now...” Louis looks at him and nods. He sits again and observes Harry’s expression. Angelic. Beautiful and without any worries. Just like Harry wanted it. Louis needs more of it. He needs to see and hear more from this man. He wants to see every single piece of him in this state. This is just the beginning, he knows it. After minutes Harry gives Louis the signal to free him from the ropes, Louis takes care of it and Harry’s wrists and ankles. “I want to do this again...” Harry mumbles while he lays in Louis' arms. “I would love to do it again too, Harry. Do you want to set a fixed date for it?” Harry nods. “That would be good. I will need this at least once a week...” “Sounds good to me.” After that, every Thursday is Harry&Louis day.

Harry gets home and lays on his own bed. He feels good. Better than the day before, less scared. He looks outside of his apartment. He was on a high floor so he could see over the whole city. Harry feels more normal and able to hold his own monster in charge. He is just happy.  
For the rest of the day, he watches some series on his TV and eats something. Just doing nothing without being haunted by any thoughts.

Harry’s weekends slowly and the next week begins slowly too. He writes a few chapters of his new book, but without feeling out of control. He even goes out to the next coffee shop and works there for a few hours a day. His fantasies are still there. The urge and lust to see the pain on others faces are still there. But… it’s fine. Harry doesn’t feel he must do it. Alright, it is still weird when he smiles when he writes about torture and death but he isn’t nervous anymore. He feels better.

On Wednesday, even his therapist notes it. “You look very content Mr Styles.” says Mr Payne. Harry smiles. His week was slowly since his last visit but on the other side still stressful for him to observe his own actions every second. “I am.”  
“How comes?”  
“Well, I thought about your idea and tried it.”  
“To switch from Dom to Sub?”  
Harry nods.  
“Good that it helps you. I can clearly see the results. When did you go?”  
“A day after our meeting. On Thursday.”  
Mr Payne was impressed with it. It was almost a week over and Harry was still in a good mood. He writes in his notes. “That’s very good. So, tell me now about your week, how did it go?”  
Harry tells him about the uneventful week. Most of Harry’s weeks are uneventful but that is good in this case. Harry makes also good money from his many successful books so money and the possible stressful factors from it were never a real problem.  
At the end of the weekly meeting with his therapist, Harry just should look forward to his play with Mr. Tomlinson and stay in control of course.


	2. Chapter 2

For Harry, it feels good to be back at the club. He stands right before the door, about to knock. His hands are shaking, like the last time, he is nervous. After he knocks he could feel his heart beat goes off and he feels like dying when Louis opens the door. “Hello Harry.”, he says sweetly, “Come in.” Harry goes straight into the room and Louis closed the door.  
“Hello, Mr. Tomlinson” Harry says and signals with it that he wants to start the play immediately. “How was your week Harry?”  
“Better, sir.”  
“Good. I thought maybe we could talk a little like last time, to get to know each other after this will be a long-term relationship. But I guess, you want to be tied up while we talk?”  
Harry smiles weakly and nods. A shiver goes through is body, “Please sir.”  
“Then sit on the bed, love. Lean against the pillow I prepared for you. Also undress yourself like last time.” Harry walks toward the bed while undressing. On the headboard of the bed was a big pillow. Harry crawl up to it and lean against it. He also sees that Mr. Tomlinson prepared a little, beside Harry are some leather chains and a big chain. Big enough to being tied up around the waist. 

Harry calms down a little. Louis sits before him with more leather chains behind him. He smiles at Harry, “Ready love?”  
“Yes, sir.”  
Louis nods and begins to tie Harry up. After that, Harry's hand where fixed on the bed and, like Harry thought, the big chain around his waist. He tries to move a little but even if he wanted to get away he couldn’t. Good.  
“I think today we should tie your leg together, what do you think?” Louis asks.  
“Sounds great.” Harry answers quietly with a smile on his face and watches while his legs get tied up. After Louis is finished he strokes up and down Harry's legs. “Looks good Harry. Very good.” Harry closes his eyes for a moment to let the feelings think in. Mr Tomlinson is in charge now, Harry thoughts, don’t worry. He feels his muscles relax and his breath gets steady. 

Harry opens his eyes again and looks directly at Louis. He had watched his sub while he calmed down. “Everything good Harry?”  
“Yes.” Harry simply answers. “Good, then we should talk a little more. I want to make these sessions as good as possible for you. Even if I’m the Dom I would never do something you don’t like. But I think you know about this talk, right?” Yes, he knew and hated it every time. Harry hates boundaries while the sex-plays. It could be one reason why he always was so stressed after them. But where were his own boundaries as a Sub? Suddenly Harry gets pulled out of his train of thoughts. “What are you thinking about?” Louis noticed that Harry became tense again.  
“That I always hated this kind of talk.”  
“Why?”  
“I hated the feeling of the responsibility I got. It’s so stressful...”  
“So, you like to give the control to another person. I think that was clear after the last time when you could be relaxed after I took your responsible to control yourself. The same today. But why? If you really don’t want to answer the question I can respect it. On the other side, it would be easier for me to give you what you need.”  
Harry thought about it. He couldn’t tell Louis the whole truth so, “I always have to be on a good behaviour. I can’t lose the control over my body… I can’t say more...”

Louis is silent for a moment. “That’s all right love.” It wasn´t the answer he wanted to hear but he should respect it. He also has a job to do. Harry may be in chains but for Louis, it’s not enough control. Louis would like to set up a few rules but he things that it might be the wrong way to try to control him. If Harry wants no responsibility he wouldn’t get it and Louis has more than one idea to control the other man.  
Louis gets up from the bed and goes over to the drawer. He took out a little vibrator egg for the penis with a little binding on it so it wouldn’t get off. When he got back to Harry he sits on Harry’s legs. “Can I take your underwear off sweetheart?” Harry’s is curious why he didn’t saw the toy yet. He lifts his hips as good as he could and Louis moves them to the leg chains, they couldn’t get off completely.  
“I want to talk a little more Harry but I would like you to wear this.”, He shows Harry the vibrator, “I’ll not always tell you what I’m gonna do so never forget the safe words.” Harry only could answer with a “Yes sir.” when Louis already shoved the vibrator around Harry’s middle hard cock and turned it on the lowest level.

Harry whimpers a little and his abdomen twitches slightly. He could feel a soft, constant vibration on his cock which made him harder and he quickly feels a sweet feeling of arousal. He tries to move his hand to intensify this feeling but he still was tied up. He whimpers again and saw than the smile on Mr Tomlinson’s face. “Feels good, right?”  
“Yes, sir.”  
“Then we talk now. What is your favourite colour...?”  
They talked (Louis teased him) about thirty minutes. He now sits on the other side of the bed, so for Harry out of reach. Louis asked Harry a bunch of questions about his life and what he likes. Also about his job. “So, you are a Writer?” Louis asks.  
“Y-Yes, sir. I write books a-a long time now.”  
“And what kind of books?”  
“Mostly th-thrillers with horror e-elements.”  
“How brutal...I guess I will look at them later.”  
Harry only smiles as an answer. He is too much occupied with his cock. It was a very long half an hour for him. The vibrator still on but too sensitive to make him cum. It torturous him, makes him feel crazy. His dick twitches almost the whole time. It is very difficult for Harry to concentrate. He also becomes sweaty and hot, mostly under his chains. Harry to closes his eyes and his heavy mind still hurts.

“M-Mr. Tomlinson...” he whines.  
“Yes?”  
“Please… touch me...”  
Louis smiles, “Is it too much sweetheart?”  
“More sir. Give me more, please.” Harry graves for attention. His skin is sensitive but everything is so heavy. “It’s not enough...” he whispers. Louis decided to intense the vibration slowly. Harry's throat left a sweetly moan and he throw his head back. His breath is heavier while Louis intense the vibration once more. He crawls up to Harry and craps his chin. “Is that better love?”, Louis asks. Harry’s dick twitch more and his hips squirm. He is helpless under the stimulation needing more physical contact on his skin. Louis caress Harry’s lips with his thump. Harry’s brain slowly turns off and concentrate completely on the ongoing arousal in his abdomen, groin and dick. He opens his mouth to lick at Louis thump, saliva runs down his mouth and chin. Harry can’t move any more, paralysed and chained up. He feels Louis is petting his face and he leans against the touch.  
Suddenly the stimulation from the vibrator is gone, Harry whines in protest but within seconds’ moans loudly when Louis craps Harry’s cock in his hand and pumps him merciless. He shakes in uncontrollable lust, “Cum.” Louis whispers directly in Harry’s ears in a husky voice.

Harry cums hard leaning against every chain, holding his body back to react. He feels high, his mind is light and flowing on a cloud. Still sensitive and without strength he leans on the bed. Louis removes the chains one by one. Harry’s legs are satisfying heavy also his arms. He feels free in his chest and warm. Louis lays him on the bed while he cuddles him. Harry needs comfort now until he comes back.  
Louis pets his hair, holding him close. Harry’s eyes are slightly open and his breath normal calm. Harry is calm. His body at peace. No worries.  
When Harry comes back from his high he looks at Louis, “Thank you...” he says in a sweet innocent voice. Louis answers with kisses on Harry head.

This goodbye is harder than both expect. The time was up. “I see you next week Harry. Take care of yourself.” He smiles sweetly and his eyes shine. Harry nods. He didn’t talk much after his visit. Louis looks after Harry and feels lost like he has no purpose anymore. This day he begins to read Harry’s books.

Harry closes the door of his apartment. Slowly progressing what happened in the last hours. His mind wanders to Louis eyes fixed in his and a shiver goes through his body. It’s a good shiver, it frees him. He sums a melody while dancing around his apartment.

The next day Harry needs to continue his work. He goes in his office room and starts his computer. While checking his mails he got a message from his manager. He wants to visit Harry in his apartment. “Important changes needed to be discussed.” Harry freezes, still looking at the mail. What important things could it be? The first reaction from Harry is, that he doesn’t want his manager here. He avoids human interaction for a good reason. They make him nervous, destroying every inner wall from him. The better he knows a person more difficult it is to not take advance of the trust in him. He feels his hand itching by the thoughts of what he could do but pushes them away immediately.  
What should he do? His manager wants to see him on Monday morning. He has time to prepare his mind for it.

The weekend goes by slowly. Harry is nervous but he feels prepared. He put away any sharp things in his apartment. He said his therapist to check every hour on him via. WhatsApp and he had his session with Louis, which still calms him down by even thinking of it. Then his doorbell rings, it’s show time.

Harry opens the door and sees a man. Short brown-blond hair and glasses. Behind the glasses young blue eyes. “Hello! My name is Niall Horan. You are Harry Styles, right? My client?”  
The man was a bit too loud but had a friendly smile. “Yes. Come in...” and he let the man in. They go into the living room while Niall continues talking. “It’s very awesome to finally meet you. Six years, can you imagine? Why do you never wanted to meet? I guess that’s not my business, but I’m just curious.” He rambled a lot.  
“Why are you here?” Harry asks, ignoring Niall question. “Oh! Right.”, Niall sits on the sofa and takes out some papers, “I got a letter, a really good opportunity I may say. Some film studios really love your books and want to make a film based on it! That’s so cool! I had to tell you that in person.”

Harry isn’t quite sure how to react. He is still overwhelmed with Niall but he doesn’t stop talking. “If you give them the right to do so they would like to work with you together on it. You know, writing the script, being in the important meetings and sometimes being in the studios while filming. The whole process. You are a famous person Harry. A cooperation would benefit both sides. Your sale numbers would grow and your success would be safe. So how do you like it?” Niall stares at Harry.  
“I... well...that’s very much to think about, to be honest.” Niall stands up. “I understand. You need time to think, right. I will give you the papers I got and my card. Think about it and if you want to do this just come to my office and we can sign the stuff and make it work.”

Niall went as quick as he walked into Harry’s apartment. He left the papers in the living room. Harry’s brain still tries to progress what happened. People wanted to make films about his work. He feels honoured but on the other side very nervous. They want to work together with him. Over six year he hasn’t worked with anybody, just thinking about it makes him anxious. Thinking about the risk lets him shiver his body alarmed. Harry walks into his bedroom, closes the curtains and closes the door. He let the darkness in his mind and focus on it. He tries to steady his breath but his skin still itching. He crabs his thighs and pushes his nails in it. It hurts but the feeling must stop. The pain is good, reminds him of the control he needs. When he calms down he lays on the bed looking in the dark, sinking away. He spread his arms and legs, focus on his breath and waits until his body finally falls asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Harry wakes up with an unsure feeling. He doesn’t know what to feel. After the breakfast, he decides that he need a distraction. Writing seems not the right thing to do so he goes out in the park near his apartment. Normally he only went out at night so it’s weird to see the people there. He walks straight to his favourite point and settles down. Harry looks over to a little pond, watching the baby ducks swimming. His head still feels fizzy from yesterday, even when he tries to sort out his thoughts they still fly around his head uncontrolled. Harry can’t decide this big decision on his own and feels helpless.  
“Harry?” a familiar voice says. Harry turns around seemly surprised. “What are you doing here?” Louis asks. Harry still doesn’t know what to say and just stares. He never was interrupted at his save place. When Harry said nothing, Louis decided to just sit next to him, “I hope that’s ok with you. I normally sit here always on my break.”  
“Your break?”, Harry asks.  
“Yeah, I work in the family business. Pretty fun and since we are such a big family it’s less stressful than a normal job.”  
Harry says nothing more. He feels Louis heat next to him, “Why are you here, Harry? Don’t get me wrong, I like your company, but I never saw you here before.”  
“Normally when I sit here it’s in the middle of the night.”  
“Oh, a night owl eh?”, Louis smile at him and Harry really tries not to. (He fails)  
Louis giggles and Harry forgets his worries. He looks at the man and doesn’t know what to think so he just stops to think. He thinks that it should be awkward to see Louis outside of the club but he feels content with seeing him and as long no one of them makes it awkward, it isn’t.  
“I started to read your books.” Louis talks again, “Really graphic… horror isn’t my genre I guess.” Louis still smiles.  
“I’m sorry...” Harry mumbles and doesn’t know why this comment makes him feel a little bit bad about himself.  
“Don’t be. I’m just not into books I guess. But yours is good! Like really good! I read a few things your fans wrote about your works. They like it too.”  
Harry nods. He likes being complemented by Louis, “Do you think they would like a film about them?”  
“A film? That would be bloody awesome! Are you making one?”  
“Some people want to make one, yes. I just need to give my ok.”  
“Well, do so. Or do you don’t want to?”  
“I don’t know. If they do it, I have to work with them really close and… I don’t think that I can-” Harry stops talking. Suddenly feeling ashamed of himself. He only talks with his therapist about his feelings, not even with his own family.  
He feels this dark point in his soul, the lust of seeing pain, his shadow that tries to crawl outside and destroy his mind and Harry feels so ashamed of it. A cold and empty feeling burns in his stomach, he feels like falling. Useless, he is useless.  
“Harry...” Louis whispers and lays a hand on Harry’s back. Louis watches Harry carefully but Harry doesn’t seem to react anymore. So the only solution Louis saw was to comfort Harry as good as possible. He cuddled him. Warps his arms around the other one and holds him in his arms.

Harry feels Louis’ warm body around him and relaxes. He’s nuzzling himself on Louis and breath his scent. Harry starts to feel invisible chains around his wrist and ankles, the body glued on Louis. He knows that it will be better as long Louis is there. Harry begins to breath steady but heavy and his body becomes hotter. He looks up to Louis who is in shock. Harry’s eyes are watering and needy. Every touch on Harry’s skin makes him twitch. Louis can’t look away from this beauty in his arm. The lips from Harry are big and smooth, slightly open. Normally Harry only looks like that when he is in his subspace in their sessions. Louis doesn’t know what to do at first. They were in a park with too many people in it. Louis can’t take care of Harry in public but he also can’t just leave him like that. “Harry, darling. Where is your home?”, it’s the best to bring him into a familiar place.  
Harry mumbles the address, still holding on Louis. Louis pulled Harry to his feet and walks towards Harry’s apartment. Good for Louis knows where he needs to go.  
After Harry opens the apartment, Louis closes the door and pushes Harry on the wall. Harry’s eyes are wide and still glassy. Harry’s mind is full of Louis, only following what he says. “Harry, go to your bedroom. Grab a robe or anything likewise, lube and condoms to the bed. Undress and lay on the bed. On the stomach and hands on your back.”  
“Yes, Louis.”  
“Sweetheart, what should you call me while we are playing?”  
“Mr Tomlinson or sir...”  
“So, what do you want to say?”  
“Yes, Mr Tomlinson.”  
“Good love, now go and wait for me.”  
Harry hurries away into a room, most likely the bedroom. Louis takes a minute to look around. The apartment is neat. The only personal touch is the big book wall in the living room. Louis goes to the bathroom, cleaning himself a little and making himself comfortable. He also texts his sister, that his break will be longer than he thought.  
When Louis enters the bedroom, he sees a dark room. Harry is, like he says, on the bed. Next to him a tie, lube and condoms. Louis sits next to Harry. He caresses Harry’s leg, wanders up to his back and then down his arms again. Harry watches him. “Sweetheart.”, Louis mumbles in Harry’s ear and kisses the skin behind it, “What happened before?”  
Harry closes his eyes, “I-I don’t know what to do. I’m...I’m sc-scared.” Tears falling from Harry’s cheek. Louis kisses Harry’s shoulder.  
“What are you afraid of?” Harry says nothing, shaking his head. He cries more. Louis tries again. “Sweetheart. I want to help you, what do you need?” Harry’s breath is unsteady.  
“D-Don’t let...let me a-a-alone.” He cries in a pillow. Louis pets Harry’s hair, feeling a weird but strong connection to the man under him. He feels responsible for him, “I would never let you alone.” Harry turns his head a little, looking at Louis. His voice is small “Then don’t let it out...”  
“What?”  
“Then control it. Chain me up, sir.” Louis looks at big green eyes. They are searching for help. Begging Louis to do something. “Put your hand to the headboard.”, he says and Harry obeys. Louis grabs the tie besides him and fixes Harry’s hands on the headboard. “Arse in the air darling.” Louis mumbles in Harry’s ear. He lifts his bum with his legs wide open. “Good love. Do you allow me to do with you whatever I want?”  
“Yes, Mr Tomlinson.” Harry answers. Every word long and with a sweet deep voice.  
Louis nods, “Never forget the safe words.” he says before he is making himself comfortable behind Harry. Louis views Harry’s bottom. The strong and soft thighs. Louis kisses each cheek before he begins to massage them. Stroking his hand up the thighs and grabs the arse, the thumps in the slit and the hands strong around the meat, moving his hands up and down. Harry lifts his hips more towards Louis' hands. Louis massages him soft and suddenly rough and intense. Making Harry’s bottom sensitive and giving Harry waves of sweet needy feelings. Harry is feeling hot and desperate for Louis. He moans when one of Louis' hands wanders down the slit between Harry’s legs to his balls, massaging them too. Harry’s cock is hard and leaking pre-cum, he is moaning deeply.  
“Moore!” he pleas.  
“You have nothing to say here, sweetheart.” Louis answers. He takes his hands away from Harry to spread the bum cheeks softly so he sees the little pink hole. He strokes his thump above the hole just to feel it. Stretching it a little bit to testing how tight he might be. Harry whimpers but Louis ignores it.  
Louis opens the lube bottle and wets his fingers with it. He stretches the cheeks again and plays more with the little hole. Making it wet for him before he enters it. Then lets a fingertip slowly pushing inside Harry. Harry gasps and his dick twitches. Louis takes the tip out again and pushes it in again. He does is very slowly to tease Harry. Without a warning, he pushes more than just the tip in. When the whole finger is in he waits a little to let the hole stretch. He pulls it out and in again, slowly. He also pushes it on Harry’s inner walls while moving. Harry feels the touch inside him, where ever Louis moves his finger he feels whole and full. But it’s just one finger and the feeling is short term. It’s drives Harry crazy, graving for more fingers and more touch. He wiggles his hips a little. Louis seems to read Harry’s mind and allows him more. He lets two fingers enter Harry slowly. Almost too slowly. After they are in he pushes them in and out a few times more, not wanting to hurt Harry. While they are all in again he starts to spread them a little and stretches Harry’s hole from the inside. The new fullness lets Harry moan and whimper more. At first it feels weird for him but soon enough the arousal makes him crazy. Louis closes his fingers again and turns them around a little. Presses them against the walls while moving them around. His moves are still slowly. He arouses Harry more and more but it is too soft for Harry to cum.  
He already teased Harry a long time when Harry starts to beg “Sir, p-please! Faster! More!” Louis giggles, loving the helpless sound of Harry’s voice. “Is it too much love?” Harry nods aggressively. “You’ve been very good Harry. I guess I should give it you this time.” Suddenly he shoves his fingers inside Harry who feels the unexpected strong push through his whole body and lets out a short high moan. Louis shoves his fingers again inside Harry and again and again. He left out Harry’s prostate for a good reason and enjoys Harry’s reaction from the strong steady thrusts.

“Tell me when you need to cum.” Louis orders.  
“I-I think I might cum s-soon, sir.” Harry moans.  
“Then I should start the showdown. Ready love?” Harry nodded, “Y-yes, Sir”, not knowing that Louis fingers could feel even better. This time Louis shoves his fingers in and meeting Harry’s prostate directly, repeatedly. Harry pushes his head back and screams loudly. He starts to meet Louis fingers with moving his hips, almost riding them. It gets fast, hard and hot. Harry cums hard and untouched which brings Louis over the edge himself. It’s the first-time Louis cums too while getting someone else off. He is overwhelmed with it and Harry’s beauty.  
Harry breath heavy and with no orientation. He doesn’t notice that Louis frees his hands and pulls him into a cuddle position. Harry’s eyes are heavy and he falls asleep, Louis follows seconds after.


	4. Chapter 4

Louis never had sex with a client outside of the club. Since he woke up he thinks about what he is next. He has Harry in his arms, who is still sleeping, and looks at the ceiling. He knows that Harry has deeper feelings about doing what they were doing, in another word, does Louis wants to get emotionally involved with Harry and helping him? Yes, Louis wants that. Even if he doesn’t know Harry for long he wants to know more about the man in his arms. He has the urge to protect him and help him. The first thing is clear now.

Secondly. How can he help Harry? Louis knows that Harry fears to be with people and he must control himself 24/7. Why does he have to control himself? That’s the point. Finding out why and being the most helpful he can become. Louis looks at the sleeping Harry. The face soft and his breath steady. Louis bonded with this guy in a weird way and can’t get rid of it. He is too deep in it now.

After Louis could free himself from Harry’s grip, without waking him up, he starts to make breakfast. He thinks about what happened with Harry the whole time. When they were in the Park, Harry told him something about working with people for his film (A real bloody film!). That Harry isn’t good with people he knows now. But to help him, Louis needs to know why which brings him back to Harry’s need of self-control.

When Louis finishes with making breakfast and wants to wake up Harry when he sees him standing in the room. “You made breakfast?” Harry asks in disbelieve. “Of course, love. Sit down.” Louis commands softly.  
Harry sits down but still is tense. “Why are you still here?”  
“Why shouldn’t I? Or do you want me gone?”  
Harry’s head shoots up. “No! Stay! I just… didn’t I scare you off yesterday?”  
“No, you did not.” Harry nods happily and they began to eat in a comfortable silence.

“We still need to talk about yesterday.” Louis says after they finished.  
“About what exactly?” Harry’s voice is small and careful.  
“You fall into subspace in the middle of a park. In public. That’s dangerous and you can be lucky that I was there. I want to help and get to know you, Harry. I really like you and if you let me we can work on it whatever this it is. Why did you fell into subspace? What was the trigger?”  
Harry says silently. This went far. Painful far.

“You want to know me?” Harry tries to distract Louis. “I...Yeah.”, Louis blushes a little, “I really would love to. I find you very interesting and lovely. Bu-But only if you want too.”  
“I only talk with my therapist.” Harry says bluntly. Louis looks sad. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to learn about you too! I really want to. I’m just not so...good at it?”  
Louis nods, “That’s ok. Don’t worry about it. We also don’t have to develop a relationship right now. Maybe we could become friends? And from time to time we could still do sessions when you need it.” Harry relaxes and tensed up by this suggestion at the same time.

Harry relaxes because he doesn’t get the responsibility of a relationship and will still have his sessions with his Dom. That’s good. He tenses up because he never had a real friend. Maybe a few here and there in his childhood but he doesn’t like to be remembered for it anyway. What does a real friend do? He doesn’t know and becomes scared.

Suddenly Harry gets pushed out of his train of thoughts by his phone. The alarm clock for his therapy, Harry explained to Louis. “I should go then.”, Louis announced, “We will talk tomorrow? It’s our session day anyway. You still want to do it?”  
“Yes, please.” Harry says softly.  
“Then we will talk more. I had a nice morning, see you.” Louis hugs Harry and goes (after grabbing his things and so). Only when Louis is out of the building he remembers that Harry never answered his questions. 

Harry sits on the office sofa of Mr Payne. “...and that’s what happened this morning.” Harry finished. Mr Payne writes something on his notes. “Do you want to become his friend? Friendship means honesty. What do you fell about it?”  
“I definitely want to continue with the former relationship of Louis and me but I don’t know how to do friendship.”  
“He told you that he wants to help you. He can only help you when he knows what bothers you. I guess full honestly would be too much now but you have to begin somewhere. What is the nearest event you could possibly need his help?”  
“The film. Working with...other people. I’ll need more help during it...”  
“I think so too, Mr Styles. Tell him that; that you need to calm down more often also why.”  
“I should tell him that I want to kill people?”, Harry asks sarcastic.  
“No, Mr Styles. Tell him that the situation stresses you out. It’s kind of the similar. But for a friendship, it’s not enough. You should always tell how you feel. Not directly but describe it or he will feel left out. That could hurt your friendship.”  
“That sound difficult.”  
“I never said it’s easy. Every relationship makes you vulnerable and you only should open yourself up if you feel comfortable and you’re able to communicate with them. If not, it’s not a friendship. Do you feel comfortable with Mr Tomlinson?”  
“Yes.”  
“Than it’s worth a try. Don’t you think?”

“Hello Sir. How can I help you?” Harry just walks into the publisher house and a petite young Lady at the reception smiles brightly at him. “I want to see Mr Horan, please.”  
“Do you have an appointment with Mr Horan?”  
“N-No. But he said that I should come to his office anytime.” The Lady still smiles at him, “I’ll just make a short call. Please wait a moment…?”  
“Harry Styles.” Her smile fades. “THE Harry Styles? Oh my god...” She whispers before she grabs the phone. Harry doesn’t pay attention what she says but he is told that he should go on the third level to visit Mr Horan. Before he left Harry sees how the woman turn towards her co-worker, says something to them and both looking to him in shook.

Harry knocks at Niall’s door. “Come in!” His manager shouts and Harry goes in. “Nice to see you, Harry! I see you decided to sign the papers!”  
“How do you know I’m not here to refuse?”  
“Then you would have called. Take a seat.”  
Harry manager displayed the papers on his desk. The signing goes fast and Harry feels nervous after it. “What will happen now?” He asks.  
“In the first week, totally important people will start working on it. Write ideas and develop the first or second version if the script. The first actors will be discussed. After that, they would have a meeting with you because they would like to involve you and your ideas. That’s a great opportunity to get at least some control over your own work. I’ll call you when they would be ready. In the meanwhile, you should work on your new book but I pushed the deadline further so you have more time. Mostly because now you’re working on two projects.”  
After Niall’s rant Harry starts breathing again. That sound less scary for him. At least now. “I guess I’ll call you in two or three weeks.”, His manager adds, “Do you have more questions Harry?”  
“No...”, Harry says, “Actually...yes. The Lady on the reception acted weird after I said my name...”  
“Ah! I know. Well Harry. You are famous. I told you that. But you’re also one of the most famous people we have as a client and no one ever saw you before. Wish one did you talked to?”  
“The one on the left?”  
“Ahh Christine. She’s a huge fan of yours. Oh man, I guess you gave her a heart attack. You’ll get used to fans by time. Don’t worry.” Niall laughs.

When Harry and his manager where finish with talking Harry walks by the reception again. The Lady, Harry spoke to, calls him out. “Mr Styles!” Harry turns towards her. The woman blushes. “I...I just wanted to say that I-I love your books! They are amazing and unique. I hope you had a nice stay here.”  
Harry wasn’t really prepared for it. Her simile is shy but bright. A hopeful look in the young eyes. “I guess...Thanks...” Harry mutters and just walks away. While he nearly runs home he thinks about Niall’s words about getting used to the fans and he might have failed the first contact with them. Great.

Thursday arrives and Harry feels tense again. He nearly slept about three hours. He is tired and the day goes by very slow. When finally, the time comes for his session he can’t wait to see Louis again.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry sinks down into Louis hug. The body heat from the other man enclose Harry and he relaxes. His muscles become softer and his breathing steady. Louis plays with Harry’s hair, wrapping it around his fingers and massages his head. “I want you to become my friend.” Harry whispers. Louis smiles and kisses Harry’s forehead. “I’m glad. Do you want to talk now or play and talk later?” Harry giggles a softly, looks playful in Louis' eyes and says seductive, “I would like to play Mr Tomlinson.” 

“Of course love.” Louis positions himself behind Harry and lets his hands wander down on Harry’s body. Stroking and massaging the muscles and the crotch area. Harry’s beginning to heat up from excitement. “L-Louis...” Louis get under Harry’s shirt and pinch softly his nipples, “What do you call me during plays?”  
“Mr Tomlinson.” Harry moans. “That’s right love. Now undress.”  
Louis steps away so Harry can undress. While so Louis brings some warm and soft pyjamas, robes and a big, curvy butt plug. Harry presents himself. “You look beautiful, love. Bent over on the bed, arse towards me.” The young man obeys and gets on his hand and knees, looking behind himself. Louis takes the butt plug and some lube. “Than let us fill you up nicely, shall we?” Harry nods, “P-Please, sir.” Louis smiles, “So polite.”

Louis moistens one finger and begins to open up his sub. He adds one finger and slowly works Harry open, stretching his fingers. He adds the third one. After a while Harry’s hole is loose and he whimpers. His body hot and ready. Than Louis moistens the plug and pushes it carefully in Harry. He moans out loud and his hips shiver when the plug is fully in. The top of it pushes against Harry’s prostate and stretch his hole good. Harry’s cock is fully erect and craves for attention. Louis steps away again and Harry is desperate for any kind of touch. He wants to wiggle his hips but Louis just says, “Don’t move.”  
Louis serves him a glass of water and tells him to drink. “You must be hydrated this time. I’ll give you more to drink and you’ll ask when you need more, understand love?”  
“Yes, sir.”  
“Good, love. Now put on the Pyjamas and stand up.” 

Harry takes his time while dressing up. The plug is in his bum it’s big and pushes aggressively against his sweet point. Finally, he stands before Mr Tomlinson. His Master takes one robe and fixes his arms, in a cross form, behind his back. He also puts ropes around Harry’s chest to build up some tension and connects it with a double rope under Harry’s arse, around his balls and cock. Louis looks at Harry’s whole body and licks his lips. “You look so beautiful Harry.” Harry smiles and blushes a little. Being exposed to his dom and being in these warm clothes makes him hot. At the same time, his body is tied up which makes him feel like losing the control of his body. He takes a deep breath and feels the strength from the robes against his body. 

“Colour?”  
“Green, sir.”  
“Good. Lay down on the bed. We still need to fix up your legs.”  
Harry lays on the bed and closes his legs after the order from Louis. He fixes Harry’s legs from the knees down to his ankles and ends with kissing each foot from his sub. “Not too tight?”  
“No, sir.”  
“Now I’ll wrap the sheets around you so you’ll become a sweet, little sushi roll.”, Louis winks at Harry stupidly which makes Harry laugh a bit, “I give you another glass of water now and after that a few times more. You will ask me for more when you’ll need more Harry. This is important for your health. Also, use your safe words when it becomes too hot for you.”  
Harry nods serious, “I understand sir. I will.” Louis smiles proud and begins fixing the robes around the sheets above Harry’s body. Harry is in warm and soft sheets now, tied up without any chance to move and so horny from the butt plug. The sensations are overwhelming. He constantly tries to rut into something but has no chance to move. 

Louis prepares a few things more that Harry doesn’t notices and than sits behind Harry on the bed with Harry’s head in his lap. He caress Harry’s head, “How do you feel, love?”  
“Incarcerate. I can’t move. It’s feels so good, sir. But...” Harry nuzzles his head into Louis lap.  
“But what?”  
“I...I’m horny sir. I need more sir. I can’t move the plug.” Harry whines. Louis smiles mischievous.  
“You doesn’t have to move sweetheart. Don’t worry about that.” Louis lays his one hand on Harry’s cheek. Harry wants to ask what that means but suddenly he screams from the vibration. The strong vibration coming from the butt plug which is still pressed against his prostate. Harry writhe around but is unable to do something or to stop it. He feels like his body isn’t his own. He doesn’t belong to him any more. He is under Louis will. Harry feels hot and good. He is in the cage called his body and he can’t control what is happening with him. He gave up the control. Tears forming and falling. His body is weak and shivering. He moans and other inhuman sound leaving his throat. 

“Shh, you doing good love. So So good.” Louis comforts him while pushing the power of the vibration down. (He has the remote controller in his hand.) Harry breath is fast and flat. The heat makes him feel dizzy and in addition with the arousal, he fells into subspace. He only feels, his thoughts and walls are away. No worries. No reality.  
Louis gives him a little bit water and continues to caress his head while the vibration in Harry’s arse stays steady. “So good.” Louis whispers. He feels Harry’s forehead. It´ s hot and Louis grabs besides him into a bowl of ice cubes. Louis let the cube wander on Harry’s face who moans from the cold. Harry feels another cold on his cheek and after a while on his neck. He whimpers and moans loudly, feeling his orgasm building up. 

Louis plays a little more with the ice and pushes the power of the vibrator up again. He wants that Harry is losing it totally. He wants him screaming when he is cumming. Harry begins to moan Louis name. Loudly. Louis thinks that he might loose his own mind too. Harry looks too vulnerable and innocent. Under his control.  
He checks again Harry temperature and teases him with more ice. Harry is now near his release. His abdomen tense up, “I-I’mm gonna cuum!” He shouts out. “Do it, Harry. Cum for me.” Louis whispers in Harry’s ear.  
With the constant pressure in his arse, Harry cums hard. He lets go of everything and his orgasm seems to take minutes. He screams Louis name over and over again, lost in the heat and the feeling of releasing. His mind is in the clouds and he feels warm and comfy. 

After minutes and minutes of heaven he starts to feel the refreshing cold. Louis is releasing him from the sheets and removes the rope one after one. Harry’s body is heavy and his mind is sleepy. He still can only feel and he feels so good. Louis touches feels so good. “Cuddle...” He mumbles. “Harrey wants to cuddle.”  
Harry is now just in his Pyjama, plug still in him and his trousers cum soaked. “I want to clean you up, love. Just wait a minute.”  
Louis opens and removes the pyjama. He pulls out the plug, Harry moans a little. After it, he brings some towels and starts to clean up Harry. When the young man is free from cum Louis gives him water again and after that, he lays himself next to Harry. “You did good Harry. You know that?” Harry nods, “I’m tired...” he whispers.  
“Than sleep awhile.”  
While Harry sleeps Louis get off himself. His own erection has become painful hard while playing with Harry. When he comes too he moans out Harry’s name. 

Harry wakes up an hour later. He feels fresh and new. Louis sits next to him on the bed and with his phone in the hands.  
“Hi...”  
Louis turns his head, “Hi to you too.”, He smiles, “How do you feeling?”  
“Feeling good, thank you.”  
“Lovely to hear.”  
“What are you doing?”  
“I’m writing one of my sisters about work. Nothing special.”  
Harry grabs Louis pants and plays with the material. “I talked to my therapist about you.”  
“Ok...”  
“He says I should tell you what I feel. That’s what friendship is about. Trusting you… which I think I can. At least I feel like I can trust you, Louis.”  
“Thank you Harry. You can trust me and I would love to understand what happens in your pretty head.”, Louis caress Harry’s head again.  
“I’m scared. Scared of not being able to control myself and scared about the thing that’ll come. I never worked with people. It’s not… what I should do. I just can’t work with them but now I have to. That scares me. But you’re helping me. You give me breaks and I really need that. Breaks. Time to breath freely without worrying.”  
“You are honest with me and I want to thank you for that. I would love to help you. Not only as a dom, also as a friend. We can meet outside of the club if you want to talk or for a spontaneous session. We still could come here too. Is that all right?”  
“Yes… I think I like the idea of not being alone any more.”  
Louis get a cold stab in his heart. “I’ll never let you alone Harry. Never. You can always call me or text me.”  
“Thanks you.” Harry looks up at Louis and smiles at him. 

This time when Harry got home he isn’t nervous. He smiles.  
\- Home now. :D x – he writes Louis.  
-Yay :-) thx for telling x -  
Harry has a friend now. His first real friend he isn’t afraid of hurting them. Louis is able to control him and his mind recognise that. Harry doesn’t have to hide behind a wall anymore and he knows that he really needs that. Especially for the next few month.


	6. Chapter 6

After some time, Harry gets the call from Niall. His manager tells him to attend the meeting he told Harry about. It is on a Monday. On the Sunday evening, Harry becomes more than nervous. He asks Louis to come over to his apartment so he isn´t alone. Louis brings some of Harry´s favourite fast food and they eat it while watching films. They eat during Finding Nemo. They cuddle during Dr. Strange.  
Harry nuzzles his head in Louis chest and Louis has his arms around Harry’s upper body and caress Harry’s arms, kisses his head. “I really like that...”, Harry purrs.  
“Yeah?”  
Harry nods, “Didn’t felt that save in a long time.”  
Louis hums and holds him closer, “I’m glad that I make you feel safe.”  
“There is one thing I was thinking about...”  
“What love?”, Louis asks curious.  
“Well...we are friends now...and maybe I could give you a nickname? I read about it and I really like t-that…” Louis giggled softly, “Course Harry. You can call me Lou. Everyone I like kind of does.”  
“Lou… Louuuu… that sounds nice. But you should give me a nickname too”, Harry demands.  
“Hmm...let me thing… what about Haz? Hazza? Oh I have one! Harold!”  
“Louu! … Haz is fine.”  
“Haz it is.”  
They cuddle the whole night. Louis comforts Harry, every time he over thinks the meeting on the next day, Louis whispers sweet words in Harry’s ears and holds him close. Harry needs to feel close, feeling the heat and the strong body on his to feel grounded. Feeling safe and ready for the next day. 

Niall already waits for Harry in the lobby. He waves at Harry and walks to him. “Good to see you! How are you?”  
“Good, th-”  
“Perfect, then let’s go.” Niall hurries away and Harry follows him like a lost puppy. Only after they stand in front of a grey double door, Niall stops. He shortly asks, “Ready?” and Harry nods. Niall smiles big and opens the door.  
In the room are multiple people, men and women. Niall introduces Harry and all eyes are on him. Harry looks at some of the others and earned interested and a few flirty looks. “Nice to meet you.” He mumbles while sitting down. “It’s an honour to finally see the author from the famous books. But to be honest, I imaged you a bit different.” said one of the men. He smiles at Harry, so it must be a joke thought Harry. He smiles back, “Sorry to disappoint.”. A few smiled at that.

The meeting itself went good. Harry looked over the scrip and only had a hand full advises at the other writers. All of them were content and even laughed a little. Harry was introduced to a few ideas for the actors and Harry could give a few ideas for filming.  
“What about the promo? I thought it would be a good idea to involve Mr. Styles in it.” Niall suggests while Harry becomes tense after hearing his name. “Good idea, Mr. Horan. He definitely should be on the red carpet and be recognise by the premier.”  
“I thought about a single interview? Maybe after that one, one with the main actors too? We have to bring him into focus, no one even know how he looks like right now.”  
“Good thinking Horan. Will you work on the single interview? We can send you a few things Mr. Styles could say about the film and the rest lays in your hands.”  
“Brilliant! I also thought about...”  
Harry didn’t say anything during the discussion. The idea of him alone, talking to a stranger about his books made him feel weird and fearful. Why would even someone be interested in listening to him any ways, Harry thinks.  
It takes some hours but eventually the meeting is over and Harry’s brain is pudding now. So many new things to progress.  
When Harry goes alone in the lift, to leave the building, one of the woman from the meeting rushes into it with a big smile.  
“It was really exciting to finally meet you, Mr. Styles.”, she says. Harry mumble thanks. She steps towards him, “I really didn’t think that you would look that good! I always imaged famous authors to be smelly and fat but you are a real handsome diamond Mr. Styles.” Harry’s first reaction is, how rude this person was. How does she dared talking like that about people?  
Her look and voice was obtrusive too. She looks up and down on Harry and her eyes lay on his crotch a little too long. Harry stiffs, she really makes him uncomfortable. He looks helpless towards the floor numbers but there was still some left. She steps forward again and her perfume attacks his nose. She is close, too close. Harry’s blood and adrenalin pump through his veins. His look wandered to the woman’s neck. His mind goes on standby, only primal thoughts are active.  
Harry breaths deeply in and out with the thought of how it would feel to wrap his hands around her neck and pressing it. Feeling her soft skin on his hand and twist it hard. Choking her and hearing her miserable whimper, Harry licks his lips.  
The woman touches his chest, perceiving his body language wrongly as sexual interest in her. “Maybe we could move this...thing… towards a more private place?”, she whispers while her hand moves down his abdomen.  
Harry is ready to do it. To grab her neck, his hands move already. Suddenly the lift open with a loud Bing and Harry is himself again. He pushes the needy woman away and run outside on the street. His mind is blank and his body is moving by itself towards home. 

In the next moment, Harry is in front of his apartment. He slammed the door shut, his knees give up and he falls on his bum. He breathes fast and his mind is still uncontrolled. The voice in his head wouldn’t leave him alone, suggesting evil things. Telling the story of how it would have felt to hurt that woman in the lift. It is loud in his head, so loud and wild. Harry got a headache.  
Suddenly he hears a voice calling but couldn’t make out what it says. Then a scream pierces into his ears until it hurts. Something wraps around Harry and the pressure and the heat of it calm his mind slowly. The screaming become a whimper and only after some time Harry realises that he made these noises.  
He grabs whatever was wrapped around him and hold on closely. He tries to breathe normally and closes his eyes. Finally, he could concentrate on other thinks and notice Louis smell. Louis is hugging him tightly and whispering sweet soothing words.  
“L-Louiis.”  
“I’m here Haz. Don’t worry love, I’m here.”  
After a few minutes, Harry calms down. They move to the sofa, “What happened Harry?”, Louis askes worried. “Th-There was a woman a-and…”, Harry silence for a moment.  
“She was too close to me… she touched me Louis and-and I had these thoughts…”  
Louis frown, “Thoughts?”  
“I wanted to hurt her Lou...”, Harry whispers.  
“Hurt her? Harry…. what? Harry...Hey...love breath, Harry!”

Flashbacks attacks Harry’s mind. His fear of losing his control of himself was enormous. Now after he told too much, he fears that he could lose Louis too. Losing his last controls. “I’m sorry.” Harry says without impression. Suddenly he fells nothing anymore. The hole in his body was cold and empty and he looks only at one point on the floor with silent tears falling down his face. Harry expects Louis to walk away at any moment.  
“Haz...I...I don’t know what to do...”  
“...don’t you want to go now?”, Harry said without being himself. He prepared himself for a rejection.  
“Going? No, Harry, I want to understand. Understand you.”  
Harry looked at Louis, “You’re not going?”, Harry looked like a lost child in Louis' eyes.  
“No... of course not.”, Louis caresses Harry’s back. Harry leans back, nuzzles himself up in Louis' chest and closes his eyes. “...not going...” Harry whispers again and again. His feeling of falling ebbed away. He felt a need in him, the urge of comfort. He began to truly trust Louis to hold him and making him feeling safe. Louis didn’t leave that day, fearful of Harry’s well-being.  
On the other side, he begins to feel overwhelmed. Holding Harry like that makes him feel good and content, but still was unknown about so much, it scared him a little. But he didn’t want to give up. Not now... never.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it took so long :) but I'll finish the story so don't worry. 
> 
> Hope you have a lovely day <3

“How are you feeling today, Mr Styles?”  
“Don’t know. Weird, empty?”  
“Why so?”  
“I told Louis.”  
Mr Payne frowned and looked up, “What did you tell him?”  
“I told him that I wanted to do bad things...”, Mr Payne demanded Harry to talk further with his eyes. Harry told his therapist what happened in the lift, “...then I told Louis that I wanted to hurt her.”  
Mr Payne talked while taking notes, “How reacted Louis to that?”  
“He didn’t leave. But… I know he is confused. He doesn’t show it but I can feel that he wants me to explain things.”  
“I think Mr Tomlinson deserves some answers after helping you but only if you still want him to help you. The next step in involving him into your head, it is a one-way thing. Now you can still push him away but after that, he might stick with you for a long time. Whatever you’ll tell him you’ll let him inside your brain which also makes you more vulnerable than ever.”  
Harry thought long about these words, “I trust Louis. I know he would never make me feel bad about it but what if it’s too much for him? I can’t just make him deal with me...”  
“Of course, this can happen too. You know each other only for a short term of time but everything you told me about him makes me think that he would stay. He wants to help you but he doesn’t know how because he still can’t see inside you. You’re still close to him. I can understand your concern but you have to give him a chance to see what he is dealing with before he makes his decision.”  
Harry closes his eyes, leans forward and hides his face in his hands. He takes a deep breath, “I know you are right but that’s so scary. This whole situation is so unpredictable.”  
“Yes, it is and it’s normal to be scared. On the other side, that’s what friendship and relationships are about in general. Trust and risks of rejections. Real friends stay with you and other acquaintance would look away. Is Louis a real friend? At least from that what you told me. So, the only thing you can do is tell him the truth in good portions so he can proceed everything. Just don’ t push it and he’ll help you as good as he can.”

On his walk home Harry is worried. He didn’t know how he could ever tell Louis the truth but he never wants to lose him too. Harry already send Louis a message.

H: If you want to talk about it, I’m ready.  
L: Love to. Can I come over tomorrow?  
H: Sure  
L: Don’t worry x  
H: :) x

Harry thinks about the conversation the whole night. At least he gets a few hours of sleep, even if it was not long enough. The next morning, right after he finishes his little brunch, Louis arrives at his apartment. Louis hugs Harry deeply and they sit on the sofa in the lounge. After the small talk chitchat, Harry goes silent. Louis stroked his hand and looked softly at him. “So...”, Harry begins, “About Monday...”  
Harry speaks about everything he thought about the previous evening. He talks about his evil and uncomfortable side and how he began to write his books to express his feelings after his therapist helped him deal with them. He tells about his success, how it slowly began until Niall, his manager, contacted him and offered him a long-term contract. But also, how he never talked to Fans or other people. How he isolated himself to control his emotions and press them into his many, many books. Harry talks about the years where he published a new book nearly every month because he worked day and night, avoiding every moment of vulnerability.  
But someday he got a burnout and how he needed to slow down and find another way to express his feelings. Harry tells Louis how much his therapist helped him to find many ways but stick with the BDSM scene at the end. Finally acting out his feelings in a healthier way, which worked for some time but eventually, he still wasn’t able to loosen up a bit. “… then you came into my life. Finally, as a Sub, I had a way to relax and feel free.” Harry looks at his hands and Louis hands which he held the whole time. “You became my anchor over the time and my first friend in… years! But I’m still so afraid to work with people and when the woman touched me in this lift... I was in shock. Didn’t know what to do and to think about. The first thought that came into my mind was...to do… these things to her...like in my...books…. It’s a part of me… I can’t just stop it, Lou! But you always make me feel better. You help me to live like a normal human again and I… wants to thank you for that...”

They sit in silence. Harry looks outside, he couldn’t look Louis in the eyes. The evening started a long time ago and the sun began to set. Harry heard how Louis got up and leaving the room. He is ready to hear the door open and close again at any minute and his heart is on the edge to jump into the emptiness of his lonely being. He hears closely to Louis footstep. But he goes into the kitchen. Short after Louis comes back with two teas and put them on the lounge table. After that, he got a big blanket, sits beside Harry again and pulls him into a cuddly position. Louis takes his cup of tea and begins to drink it. Louis doesn’t want to talk but neither he wanted to go. His mind was full and he has a headache. He needs time to think. Harry understand that and was happy to give Louis his time. Both drink their teas and after that, they fell asleep on the sofa.

The next day, Louis walks into his mum’s kitchen. He just went from Harry (It’s still in the morning) and his mind is still proceeding what his friend told him. Louis would never leave after Harry finally told him the truth but it was still much and Harry knew that. They will meet again tomorrow for Harry’s next session and Louis already has an idea for him. But later.  
Louis makes himself a tea and waits by the kitchen table for his mother to come down.  
“Bear? What are you doing here?”, Louis heard his mother’s soft and sleepy voice.  
“Hey, mum. Just chilling in your kitchen.” His mother gave him a kiss on the head, “How are you feeling, Lou?”  
“Good I guess… just much on the mind.”  
“Is it because of Harry? Did he talk to you? You were very worried about the young lad.”  
Louis nodded,” We talked yesterday and yes, he told me… about it.”  
“Then why are you still worried?” His mother watches Louis carefully. She always knew when something wasn’t right. She could read him like an open book.  
“It’s just so much. I don’t know if I can tell you everything but it’s so much.”  
“Dear, I don’t want to know what he told you because he told you not me. I figured that it could be much for you.”, Jay sits by the table with her own cup of tea, “But give yourself time to think about it. He seems to have significant trust issues and you’re only human. If he is worth it, you’ll be able to deal with it.”  
Louis smiled, “He is worth it.”  
Jay looked at him with loving eyes, “Than don’t over think it. Take your time and just be there for him. You can’t do more, love.”  
“I know mum. It’s just… Harry has such a difficult life and he said that I was his first friend since years! He had to deal with it all alone and I saw him in his worse moments. I want to hold him and protect him before whatever he fears. I just think that I might be not good enough. Am I good enough?”  
“Of course you are, boo. Just be there for him and you do the right thing. But remember you’re not his therapist. You’re his friend. Don’t try to cross these lines or you’ll feel helpless.”  
“Thanks, mum.” Louis takes another sip from his tea. He could help Harry on his own way. His mum was right. He wasn’t a therapist but Harry’s friend and Dom when Haz needed it. He could do that.


	8. Chapter 8

Louis decides to do the next session in the club again. He already prepared his tools; Nipple clamps with a string, tight handcuffs, a whip and a hook which hung from the ceiling. Louis smiles at the thought of Harry. Teasing while experiencing a little pain but he’ll behave and standing still. Louis knows it’ll be difficult for his Sub but at the same time very hot.  
Harry knocks on the door and Louis let him in.  
“How are you feeling, love?”  
“Too many thoughts...” Harry says with a small voice.  
“I’ll help you clear them. When you’re ready, strip for me and stand beside the hook, love.”  
Harry looks towards the hook and swallows. This is new and exciting for him. He doesn´t know what would happen but he trusts Louis. “Yes, Sir.”, he says and does what he is told to.  
Louis does the last corrections on the height of the hook after Harry stood next to it. It is a little bit above Harry’s nipples and Louis smiles. He takes the nipple clamps. “Did you ever wear nipple clamps, love?”  
“S-sometimes...”, Harry blushes. How sweet, Louis thinks. “Then it’ll not be new to you. “, he put the clamps on Harry’s nipples. “Not too strong?”, Harry shakes his head, “Good.”, Louis mumbles.  
Louis holds the string from the clamps and pulls, Harry whimpered. “Follow me,” Louis commands and leads Harry towards the hook.  
“Go close on it, love.” After Harry is directly in front of the hook he takes Harry´s hands and ties them up on his back. After that, Louis put the string from the clamps on the hook so the nipple clamps pull on the poor nipples, but not too strong... just a bit.  
“How does that feel?” Louis whispers in Harry’s ear. “Good, Sir.” Harry moans.  
“Then listen good, love. When I tell you to, you’ll step a little bit back and then stay on your toes. The clamps will pull more on your nipples. When it becomes too much, you’ll step forward again on your feet and take a break before you´re stepping back again. Can you do that?”  
“Yes, Sir.”  
“Good, then begin.”, Louis steps away to make room for Harry. Harry steps back as well and then on his toes. The height of the hook makes the pull even stronger and Harry whimpers again. He stays like that for a minute but then his feet began to tremble. Shortly after, Harry stepped forward again like Louis said. Harry´s nipple feels a bit stretched, just like he loves it but the strength he has to put up while standing on his toes is more difficult and intense. He looks at Louis who watches him with this special smile which makes Harry want to do more, so he is stepping back again. This little game went on for five minutes until Louis takes the whip and went behind Harry. “How do you feeling?”, Louis asks.  
“It hurts...”  
“Good or bad pain?”  
“G-good pain, Sir.”  
Louis strokes the whip along Harry’s thighs up to his naked bum. He is touching softly against the skin with it. While Harry was on his toes, Louis hit strong. Harry yelped in surprise but stays still to move the nipple clamps as little as possible. Louis hits him again on the arse and Harry feels the sharp controlling pain moving through his body. Even if he tries to stay still, his chest moves forwards a little. The clamps pulling at his sensitive flesh and Harry couldn´t control his noises in that moment. Harry´s legs feel weak, his bum hurts just like his nipples. Sweat runs down his legs and he feels alive. Louis acknowledges the beautiful Sub and hits a third time.  
Harry needs to step forward again and Louis gives him the break and walks up to him to stroke his Subs back.  
“I think it´s time for you to lay on the bed, don´t touch your nipples”, Louis says while he frees the nipple clamp chain from the hook and let it down gently without taking them off. Harry nods, his body is on alert and the pull on his nipple is almost painful. He lays on the bed and waits for Louis who takes some wrist chains with him. He fixes Harry's hands above him on the bed and strokes his hands slowly down. Over Harry's arms, then armpits – tickling his sub on his sides a little for his own enjoyment- and when the banter is over he starts to massage Harry's chest, breast and then slowly around his very sensitive nipples. Harry is very responsive and whimpers under the light touch. Louis takes the clamps off slowly and throws them from the bed, he tries to hurt Harry as less as possible during it. He softly touches the sore nipple which hurts at the beginning but after some caring rubs, Harry moans deeply. Exactly this reaction is what Louis was waiting for and lowers his head to kiss Harry's nipple. A cheeky kiss on each nipple and a big lick right after it, the sensation is overwhelming for Harry but of course, it could become better after Louis starts to suck hard on the nipples. Harry threw his head back on the bed and arches his chest towards Louis. He moans Louis name over and over, his dick becoming thicker and his legs begin to shake.  
“Please, Sir. Touch me!”, Harry plea. Louis looks into Harrys eyes, let his hand wander above Harrys hard member and rubs gently over the head, “You mean here?”, he asks and Harry nods. “Please, more.”, he whispers. This time Louis couldn’t play with him, he wasn´t in the mood for that so he did as Harry demanded but of course not without a catch. Louis rubs over Harry's nipple the last time before he wanders down to Harry´s cock. He massages the hard member slowly, locks his eyes with Harrys and starts to lick the head.  
Harry´s eyes close automatically but, “Eyes open, love.”, Louis demands and Harry obeys. Louis kisses Harry's dick more and licks softly along the shaft. Seeing Haarys eyes pleading for more makes Louis horny himself. He loves this expression and without noticing Louis begins to rub his own erection above his trousers. Harry whimpers and breaks out a loud moan when Louis took him more into his mouth. Harry doesn't look away from Louis and when his Dom started to touch himself he lost his mind. But suddenly Louis notices what he is doing and stops.  
“No…”, Harry protests weakly, “Please… touch yourself too, Sir.” Harry is blushing deeply but he wants nothing more than to see Louis getting pleasure out of Harrys. In this moment Harry feels very proud of himself in a long time. Harry looks deeply into Louis' eyes, “Come on me, Sir. Please.”  
Louis stops breathing for a few seconds. Slowly, without thinking, he opens his trousers and pushes them down. He kneels above Harry, hands on his sides, cock hard. Harrys own cock twitches and he moves his hips, “Like that, love?”, Louis asks and begins to jerk off slowly. Harry follows his movements with his eyes and can´t look away from his Doms dick. He licks his lips while Louis moves his hand quicker. Seeing Harrys so needy for Louis makes him go crazy. His arousal doubles and his hips start to meet his hand.  
“I´m close, love.”, he breathes out hard, “Gonna cum on your belly. Making you dirty.”.  
Harry breath sharply and his hips move higher towards Louis dick, he is desperate for any kind of touch, “Please, please, please.”, was the only thing Harry could say right now.  
Louis cums on Harry like promised. His moans are music to Harry's ears, he knows that he is on the edge of cumming himself. After a few seconds recovery, Louis laughs softly at Harry's state, “Ow, Love. All worked up for me, eh? Liked seeing me cum on you?”  
Harry nods quickly, looking at his stomach, covered with Louis sperms.  
“You are quite excited.”, Louis says before licking the pre-cum from Harry's dick, “I want you to cum too, love. Cum whenever you need to, yeah?”  
“Yeah. Thank you!”, Harry whispers and Louis takes Harry´s dick in his mouth. He swallows him deep and as quick as he could, only a minute later Harry cums in Louis' mouth, shooting his cum into Louis' throat.  
After Harry becomes conscious again he finds himself in Louis' arms, his hands-free again.  
“Thank you, Lou.”, Harry whispers. Louis smiles, “Awake again?”, Harry nods.  
Louis takes care of Harry before they decide that the best it to drive Harry home again. Harry feels safer in his apartment anyway. The drive was quiet and Louis was very happy about it. Today is the first time he got himself off during a session. That it was with Harry made it more difficult. Not bad difficult but… Louis feelings for the man grew faster than he would like them to grow. Harry wasn´t ready for a romantic relationship, to cover up his own feelings would be a part of his life for a short time. At least Louis hopes it would be a short time only.

They arrive at Harry´s apartment and the atmosphere is calm. They make tea and discuss which movie they should watch before Louis has to go home himself. Harry walks towards his telephone and sees that he has one voicemail from his Manager, “Heeey, buddy! Ok, I´ll never call you buddy again BUT I have a wonderful message for you! I managed to use my magical powers and got an interview date for you!! Eh? How does that sound? Awesome! I know! It´s also in the next few days but I´m gonna send you the details via e-mail. But this is the first step into your media presence! Obviously, there will be no questions about the movie but we need to make you present to this world! Oh, before you get a heart attack, it is a print media interview! So only a nice person in a room with you talking about things, so nothing with live cameras or anything. I know how much you would hate it. Anyway, I should stop now. I´ll send you the email now! Bye!”  
Harry just stands in front of the phone, Louis has heard everything so he walks up to Harry.  
Louis looks at him. He is still calm from the session earlier but Louis can see the doubted in his eyes.  
“What?”, Harry manages to say, still looking at the telephone. He looks at his phone to see if the email arrived and it had. Harry sits on the sofa nearby, Louis follows him worried. Harry´s eyes are concentrated and tense.  
“Niall says the interview is in two days… in a hotel… if that sounds not totally weird…”, Harry's hands begin to shake. Louis takes Harry´s hands, “Are you okay, love?” Harry doesn´t know how he feels about it. Niall told him there would be interviews but he has no idea what to do with them. In the email Niall had written that he just needs to answer the question, Niall took care of everything else.  
“Do you think you can come with me, Lou?”, Harry asks Louis, his eyes a bit fearful.  
“Yeah, sure. I think I can make room for it. Don´t worry, everything will be fine.”  
Louis tries to comfort Harry as good as possible until he goes home.

The Hotel is full and loud, Louis sits in the foyer for an hour now. He brought Harry to the Hotel room and said he would wait right here, in the foyer. Louis taps with his foot on the ground repeatedly, he is so nervous. What if the woman is rude to Harry? What if Harry loses control? No, no that would not happen. Louis made sure himself that Harry is prepared for this interview and Harrys Manager did his best too. Louis just has to be patient and not freak out.  
Ten minutes later Louis sees Harry coming out of the lift walking into the foyer. He looks tired and like a scared rabbit. Louis heartbeat goes faster and he walks quickly towards him. Harry smiles softly at him and lets Louis guide him outside towards Louis car. They sit in the car quietly.  
“All good?”, Louis whispers.  
Harry nods, “Just want to go home, please.”  
When they arrive Harry´s shaking and goes to sleep immediately with his hands and feet tied together and a warm Louis wrapped around him.

________________________________________________________

[Name of very important Magazine]

OUR FAVOURITE HORROR AUTHOR SHOWS HIS FACE  
The first interview with the world famous Author from the books “The Child´s Eyes” and “Family Blood”: Mr Styles

I never thought this day would come and I would meet one of my favourite authors Mr H. E. Styles. We all know him and love him from his unique Horror Thrillers and Krimi Romans, two of his most famous works “The Child's Eyes” and “Family Blood”.  
The moment Mr Stlyes entered the room I could not believe my eyes. I always thought he would be an older man but no, Mr Styles is just 26 years old young lad. A young man with eyes who look right through your soul, I am very happy that I was allowed to take a picture of him, so here you go.

Mr Styles writes books since many years and all of the time we always wondered “Who is this man who writes about murder and slaughter in such a detail?”. He writes to realistic that even I had to stop reading many times while I had one of his books in my hand. All the more not eating while reading! I made this mistake only once!  
His dark magnificent worlds bound all of us to his words and never let go until you would finish the book.  
My goal for this interview was to meet him, not really to ask many questions. I am a fan of his works for so many years, I needed to know “Who is that man?”. I can tell you that this man is able to bind you to his spoken words just as well to his written one. Calm, almost predator like. His eyes always watching you. You can even feel the same energy from his books in his presence and I was drawn to it.

Of course, some important questions I had to ask.

Yes, soon he will bless us with another work of his! He doesn´t know the title yet but from what I heard it should be very good! Unfortunately, I can´t tell you details yet.

Another question I just had to ask was, where do his ideas come from?  
He didn´t answer it like I would like to hear but some hints he gave like, “Just Fantasy, I guess? (…) Maybe I just watched too many Horror movies as a child? (uncomfortable laugh)” Yes, I know. I could have got a better answer but I tried!

For the end a few extra pieces of information I could get out of him.  
He likes green tea. His star sign is Aquarius, but he doesn´t celebrate his birthday anymore. For the ladies out there, yes. He is single.

 

Author: Mrs XXWhatever  
[Name of very important Magazine]


	9. Chapter 9, Part 1

The interview is a big success for Harry, even his Twitter follower went into high numbers. Yes, Harry has a Twitter-account now, which he rarely uses. But when he does he loves to read comments from fans on his work. Harry never realised how much impact the books have on people’s lives or with how much passion his books are loved, he feels a strong inspiration from these reviews and his current writing goes off easily. This recognition feels like a new drug for Harry, craving for more attention but on the other hand, it becomes too much for his nerves too. Harry starts to fight with two new extremes in his life he must learn to control and balance. Harry is very glad that he has Louis in these days. Talking with his therapist about his feelings to find the core of them and be able to form words around them is useful and essential but having moral support every day makes it a lot easier for him.   
Harry and Louis form a routine around their lives. They text each other constantly if not one of them must work. In the evenings Louis visits Harry, eats dinner and goes home later. On some days he sleeps over at Harry's as well. 

When Louis stays over, they start watching a movie or a series on Netflix and lay on the couch together. Sometimes they even cuddle, just like this time. Louis lays on the couch fully with Harry on top of him, Harry's legs in between Louis´s. Harry´s head rests on Louis' chest and Harry enjoys hearing Louis heartbeat because it calms him down. Louis´s hand is in Harry's hair, Harry thinks that he might fall asleep like that. Louis start massages Harry´s head and curly boy feels how the strength leaves his body.   
“Can you turn off the tv, Lou? I don´t want to watch anymore.”, he mumbles into Louis' chest and Louis has to admit that he stopped watching minutes ago.  
“Sure, love.”, he switches off the device and turns his attention back to the man on top of him, “How are you feeling?”  
Harry closes his eyes, “At the moment? Good. Don´t wanna leave the couch for forever.”  
Louis giggles softly, “Don´t have to.”  
Louis continues massaging the soft curls and he starts pulling softly at them, knowingly that Harry gets off to that feeling, Louis might feel a bit cheeky this evening. At first, Harry tries not to show any reaction but with every tug, arousal is building inside of him. “Is this ok, love?”, Louis asks because of course, he notices Harry´s struggle anyway. Harry nods and changes the position of his hips so his crotch touches the couch and starts to move slightly. Harry´s feeling a mix of safety and continuously arousal (he is always a bit horny when he is with Louis) he never really felt before or at least never acknowledged before. He can´t hide a smile and closes his arms around Louis body to bring them closer together.   
“I have been thinking about something, Harry.”, Louis starts again. Harry hums, “What, Lou?”.  
“I…I would like to make our session more… intimate.” Harry frowns a bit, not truly understanding what he means and asks for further explanation.  
“I mean like… like we agree on some more things… for example that… we don´t do other sessions with other people or… being a bit more…closer. This kind of things.”, Louis looks away from Harry, even though that Harry had never looked at him, he is still cuddled up on Louis' chest.   
Harry thinks about it, he is totally fine with Louis being his only Dom. He never had anyone besides Louis. What he doesn´t understand is being more closer. Does Louis mean more touching? Maybe …more bum stuff? Harry is fine with anal sex, he trusts Louis and well, Harry becomes a bit hard thinking about it. Having sex with Louis, kissing him during orgasms… oh. It hits Harry suddenly because kissing can be very intimate. Especially during sex. Now, Harry is very aware of his own position where he lies and his thought coming in quick. He is aware of Louis breathing and quicker heartbeat. Harry feels very vulnerable right now but that is not the only thing he feels. He feels the pull towards Louis, the safe ground Louis gives him. It is something Harry doesn´t want to lose as long as he lives and he is afraid of thinking he might lose Louis someday. Harry has to be honest, he never felt like that before. Maybe he does, but he tries not to think about these memories, he tried to hide them his whole life and will not stop hiding them now. Harry is lost in his own mind, overthinking the situation clearly. His breath goes rapidly he starts to feel the familiar tingling under his fingers, wishing he had something sharp. His finger wanders ghostly above Louis hipbone skin, Harry´s body tenses more, imagining the skin breaking and the warm blood flowing out of it, desperately to heal the fresh wound. Harry´s shaking and smiling maliciously while the feeling of control and chaos run through him-   
“Harry, love. What is it? Is something wrong?”, Louis asks suddenly and Harry is being pushed out of his mind again. Harry is cold and he looks up finally, seeing Louis worried face.   
“Did I say something wrong?”, Louis asks again, “I´m sorry Haz. Maybe it is the wrong time to ask something like that, I am sorry-“  
Harry stops Louis rambling by coming closer to his face and sharing a gently kiss on Louis' cheek.   
“Don´t be sorry, Lou.”, Harry says and looking in Louis' eyes again. The cold leaves his body again and he feels warmer. Harry takes Louis face in one of his hands and caresses it with his thumb. “I thought about what you said and… I realised how much I am afraid of losing you…”, Harry lets his head fall against Louis collarbone, “Isn´t it weird? We know each other for such a short time but losing you would be the worst thing that could happen to me now…”  
Louis is stunned a bit, he feels proud of himself to urn so much trust for Harry to say that, but Harry didn´t answer his question yet. Louis is waiting for Harry to continue his thoughts patiently.   
“I am scared of being more intimate, Lou but… the want to be closer to you is stronger, I think.”

That is what Louis hoped for to hear, he wrapped his arms around Harry and nuzzles his head into Harry's neck. He is relieved that he didn´t overstep boundaries, “I am a bit scared too but happier as well. I want to be closer to you Harry. During sessions but also in general… I hope that is ok…”   
“I feel safe with you Louis. I trust you… It is so new to me…but I have a feeling that we could work it out…right?” Louis pushes his head back, smiling wide at Harry, “We can.”  
Both stare into each other's eyes, forgetting about the world around them. The energy in the room changes slowly and the urge to kiss each other is there like an elephant in the room. Louis brings his hand up to Harry's hair again and pulls softly. Together with the tension by looking into the eyes Harry moans loudly, not afraid of his own voice. Louis gaze changes and he lets his dominant side look through the surface, just a little bit. Louis pulls at Harry's hair again, watching him like a predator looking right at his meal. Harry melts under Louis' eyes, he can´t help himself anymore. He loses his control and starts rocking his crotch against Louis´. Harry moans loudly again, losing more and more control of himself after every single move. Harry´s eyes become glassy, looking at Louis like an anchor on the wild sea. Louis smiles cheeky and grabs Harry's arse and massaging it in the same rhythm as he pulls on his hair.   
“I am here, baby.”, Louis whispers in his raspy voice, “I'm holding you, let go.”  
Harry´s head goes back suddenly, he moans loudly while his hips move faster, fighting for the release Louis allowed him to have whenever he wants. Louis sees how Harrys closes his eyes in concentration, his mouth wide open as an invitation to suck everything Louis wants him to swallow in every giving moment. Both feel that Harry is on the edge of cumming. His cheeks are flushed and his breath heavy, “L-Louis.”, he whimpers.   
Louis cups his face and kisses his man deeply while Harry takes his last few tucks against Louis and comes hard with his whole body. He moans loudly into Louis' mouth and he takes it like it is a gift from the gods themselves. Harry shoves himself onto Louis, pumps the last cum out of his body before he falls on Louis. Both breathing hard, Harry´s a bit spaced out but Louis senses are sharp. It takes a bit of strength for Harry but after a few minutes, he is able to push his body up. He feels that Louis is rocking hard, still. Without permission or comment, Harry opens Louis trousers and pushes them and his pants down. Louis´ hard penis is in front of his face, he looks at it like it´s the precious thing in the world. He kisses the top of it and looks at Louis, Harry opens his mouth and waits.   
Louis grins and takes Harry's hair again and shoves his head down on his cock. Louis feels floaty and his head is in heaven. He looks at Harry, taking his cock in his mouth and throat like he was made for it, his eyes looking at Louis, wanting nothing more than pleasing Louis. Louis can´t take it anymore and starts fucking into Harry´s mouth, it doesn´t take long until he comes in Harry's mouth, moaning Harry´s name and never stopping praising his man for taking him so well. Harry tries to swallow Louis cum as good as he can but some of it leaks out of his mouth. He can feel his own penis becoming sensitive again and his whole skin tingles with excitement. He licks Louis dick clean before Louis pulls him up to him, so he can lick his own cum from Harry´s mouth before he kisses him again.   
Both lay on the couch, breathing heavy and feeling floaty but so so good. They are smiling and after a quick visiting the bathroom, they fall asleep in Harry´s bed. Holding close to each other. 

 

“-it is just amazing, mate! The interview was a perfect start! I am so excited for the book signing I organised, I did send you the e-mail, right?”  
“Yes, Niall you did-“  
“Perfect! So you know time and date! I can´t wait! Of course, I will pick you up for it, I need to go through some security things with you I got yesterday but it´s not that bad. Anyway, it will go fine, we-“

This part of Nialls and his phone call repeat itself in Harry's brain again when he sits on an unfamiliar table, surrounded by his books and many others who isn´t his. Harry is in the bookshop where the book signing event takes place. He is surrounded by stressed people talking or more like yelling at each other while he only has to sit and wait for the people to arrive. Harry sits and plays with the pen in his hands, looking again through the chat with Louis.   
Louis tried to calm him down the best he could, but he wasn´t here. Of course, Harry would never expect Louis to leave his work just for him but he would have loved to have him here.   
Niall told him that it is just a small bookshop where he will do the book signing thing and only a few of his fans could enter the shop, who won the tickets for it. Niall had explained how they did it but he didn´t listen to it.   
A young woman enters Harry view, smiling at him, “We open the shop in 5 minutes, be ready, okay?” Harry nods and the woman goes away again. On his table were his books on display as decoration on both sides and multiple pens beside him in a small bucket. Niall told him that his fans will come up to him and they will have his books they bought or cards or whatever which he will sign. Have a few nice words with them and then the next one. They can take pictures as well but it has to be quick. On both sides are bodyguards because Niall knows that Harry can become a bit claustrophobic (Niall likes to call it that because he doesn´t know the truth) but they are nice. One is called Josh and has a nice girlfriend, they went on a holiday vacation to Greenland a few month ago, and the other one is called Maximus but his boyfriend calls him Max. 

“We open now!”, calls someone and Harry hears many excited screams while still looking down on his hands. He changes his posture and looks up finally. Slowly a queue is built in front of him, faces looking at him with happiness, nervousness and excitement. Harry was more nervous and anxious about this whole situation but his only job was to sit and be polite, he thinks that he could do that for the sake of his own peace afterwards.   
The first fans are allowed to walk forwards, a young woman and her gay friend. It is written on his t-shirt literally, “The Gay” in pink big letters. Harry smiles brightly at them and brings out a small, “Hello.”. The woman holds onto one of Harry's first book he already has forgotten about and cringes about it because it is one of his worse ones in his opinion.   
“Hi, I´m Megan and this is Robert, my best friend.”, she introduces herself and her companion. Robert waves at him shyly.   
“It´s lovely to meet you too. What can I sign for you two?”, Harry has really no idea what he is doing. Megan gives him her book, “One of the oldest.”, Harry comments while writing his own name it and a little heart because Louis told him it would look sweet if he would do it, as a joke, but Harry wanted to take it seriously. Megan rubs her hand on her neck, “Yeah, I am a fan since the first book. I love your writings and the way you developed your style over the years.” Harry gives the book back, “Thank you, Megan. I am glad that you can enjoy it.”, and shares the warmest smile he could offer. That compliment really gets to him and his own nervousness seems to fade away slowly. Harry looks at Robert, who gives him his book as well. Harry asks him if he enjoys the books too but Robert doesn´t seem to answer so Megan says instead, “Rob isn´t much of a speaker… it takes him a while to warm up to new people and even then it is still difficult for him.” The friends share a knowing look and Robert tension fades away a bit. Harry locks eyes with Robert and answers, “That´s fine. I only have one friend as well. A few month back I only talked to my therapist so you are better with talking than me.”.   
In an unknown way that has a big impact in Roberts mind and he breaks a smile too. “Thank you for writing books Mr Styles.”, he mumbles which Harry almost doesn´t hear.   
“Thank you for reading them.”, he answers and hands Robert back his signed book. 

After the first two, the rest seems to go quickly but Harry becomes more and more exhausted towards the end. That was more talking and socialising he did in a month, no years even. His mind feels tired and slows down, he even thinks that his inner mind walls might break in every second and he just wants to go home. “Only one left.”, Max says who seems to be worried about Harry. Harry nods and looks up again.   
A young woman walks forward. Harry has no idea why but he doesn´t like her. He never felt like that during the whole event and guilt builts up for feeling that way. She looks back and forth between the bodyguards, her body tenses slightly and then walks up to the table. Her smile is big but Harry dislikes her still, either way, he smiles back.   
“Hi, sorry if I seem a bit tired.”, he begins with, “What is your name?”  
“My name is Pauline.”, she answers sweetly and gives him a pretty baby pink card to sign. He writes his name down while she talks more, “I am a new fan so unfortunately, I don't own many books of yours… or any… “   
“It´s fine. I don´t care if you´re an old or new fan.”, Harry smiles while giving the card back, he couldn´t be bothered saying anything nice to her. She really gives off a weird vibe which goes under his skin. He knows that feeling he is getting from her but he never thought he would felt it coming from out of his own mind and body. Pauline is looking at him intensely, her hair falls wildly into her face which reminds Harry of one of Harrys own characters in his book but isn´t sure which one it was. She holds the card close to her body, sniffs at it before putting it back into her bag.   
“Do you have everything, Miss?”, Josh asks her kindly, clearly trying to end the event as soon as possible by sending the last fan home. Pauline nods and smiles at Harry for the last time, it was a slimy promising smile and Harry has no idea what kind of promise that even could be. Her eyes shine predator like which is the last trigger to break his fragile wall in his mind and Harrys eyes become cold as ice. His hand begins to twitch and he doesn´t break eye contact with Pauline. Her smile becomes wider and finally, Josh pushing her out of the shop. 

Harry feels his stomach twist around when Max puts his hand on his shoulder, “You ok, man? The weird ones are often the last.”. Harry nods slowly and stands up elegantly, looks around and sees Niall walking up to him.   
“Finished! Awesome, your first event! I am so excited, you are finished for the day. Do ya want to come with the team to have a drink or wanna go home?”   
Harry's vision recede and his rational thoughts seem to blow out of him, he manages a small, “Home.” and his bodyguard Max brings him home safe, before ending his work of day too. 

The moment Harry´s apartment door falls shut he lets the last guards down he had. Tears falling down his face while he steps into the kitchen, he picks up a knife and creeps slowly into the living room. The handle of the knife lays heavy in his hands and he loves to weight of it. He kneels on the couch, grabs the biggest pillow and let his thoughts flow. The eyes of Pauline come up and anger is building in his stomach. Without any warning, Harry stabs into the pillow with a scream of hatred and chaos. He slips open the pillow thinking of skin while the feeling of being lost increases in his veins. He is out of control, he stopped feeling his own skin and he has a massive headache. Harry is fighting against whatever he is right now but he has nothing to hold onto. He is lost in his darkness of his mind, no not mind, instincts. He acts without thinking, stabbing more and more into pillows and couch, letting his anger flow. 

Suddenly his doorbell rings. Harry's breath is heavy and fast, he let the knife fall onto the floor and stands up slowly. His clothes lying chaotic around his body and his hair looking wild, his eyes viewing the door wolfish, thinking what little rabbit might be behind it.   
He opens the door and he sees blue eyes. His breath is knocked out of him, and he feels numb, then like falling. He walks backwards while the blue eye creature walks into his apartment and closes the door behind them. Now Harry feels like he is the little rabbit.  
Louis looks at Harry like he never as saw him in his entire life. Harry looks done and wild. Harry's big eyes watching Louis, never breaking eye contact with him.   
Louis visits because he had promised Harry that he would come over after the event.   
“Harry, love. Is everything ok?”, He asks, hoping to get an answer but instead he could literally see Harry breaking. From wild cave man into a lost boy, better known as Harrys sub-persona, in 3 seconds.   
His eyes widen, becoming innocent, waiting for anything Louis might say, his mouth opens slightly. Louis opens his arms for Harry and with little encouragement, Harry sinks into Louis' arms.   
The moment, when Louis began to spoke, Harry could feel the robe around his soul. The robe which leads towards a safe rock, an anchor. Harry wasn´t lost anymore and would have done anything the voice would have told him because only the voice made sense anymore. From this point, Harry remembers nothing until he will wake up in the morning, well rested, laying as the little spoon in the bed with Louis. 

Harry wakes up slowly with a warm back. He faces the window which lets light into the room, Harry tries to remember what had happened the last day but could only think of the book signing event from yesterday. He couldn´t even remember coming home, it might freak him out a bit but with Louis, in the bed, he just can´t panic. Harry caresses Louis' arm and slowly turns on his back to see Louis face. The other man is still asleep and Harry smiles while watching him. Even if they didn´t name the relationship status, Harry saw enough teeny love story movies to kinda know what they are. He also knows their boundaries and facing these facts, Harry could do anything with Louis and he would be ok with it. Harry looks at Louis lips and bits his own. He really wants to kiss Louis, like…reaally wants to. He watches him a bit more to know for sure that Louis is still asleep before he leans over and kisses Louis´ lips softly. He lets his head fall back and giggles, Harry is feeling weirdly free right now. He has kissed Louis, on the lips. He wants to do it again.   
Harry lifts his head again and this time he presses his lips more on Louis´. He moves his lips around Louis, he licks Louis´s lips and tastes him. Harry moans softly and pushes his body closer to the sleeping man. Well, sleeping man until now. Louis opens his eyes, while Harry is kissing and licking into his mouth. Happily, Louis closes his eyes again and pins Harry down, trapping him between his body. Louis is on top of him now but mostly laying lazily on top of him rather being sexy or whatever.   
“Morning, love.”, Louis whispers with a deep sleepy voice.   
“Hi.”, Harry answers, smiling brightly, “Slept well?”  
Louis groans in response, “To less. More sleeping.”  
Harry grabs Louis butt and squeezing it, “No, I am awake. You can´t go back to sleep now!”  
Louis lifts his eyebrows, “Really? How says so? Hu?”  
“Me!”  
“Sure.”, Louis smiles, kissing Harry's chest once and roll off of him. He stands up and walks towards the bathroom. After he comes back he asks how Harry is feeling while drying his hands.   
“Fine, I guess. Am a little lost, because I don´t remember the most of yesterday…but…yeah…fine.”  
Louis watches Harry's eyes, not wanting to miss anything, “Really? Nothing at all?”. Harry shakes his head, “Did something happened?”  
Louis waits for a moment but finally shakes his head, “No, nothing. You were very tired and I put you to bed.”  
Harry smiles, “Aw, thank you, Lou.”, and he kisses him again.


End file.
